Wild Rose
by The Shrapnel
Summary: Wild roses cannot be tamed, but they can be cut. Bombalurina needs to find out what path she truly belongs in: that of a Jellicle's, or that of a Glamour Cat's... either way, she does it for love.
1. A Junkyard with Roses

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Well, I thought I'd be taking a week-long break after finishing The Pariah Heroic, but it looks like I couldn't resist. I guess I really enjoy writing, so at least we can all suffer through this together, WAHAHAHAHAH. Enjoy, everyone!

* * *

**Wild Rose**

**CHAPTER 1

* * *

**

The sky was darkest and the moon was brightest during the Jellicle Ball. The soberest of the human police would sleepily look up from his beat, and wonder why the Brighton Road junkyard was glowing with lights and alive with clattering noise, but put the blame on his lack of rest and turn away, every five minutes.

The festival was concentrated into one part of the junkyard, the central clearing, where the toms were dancing and the kittens were singing and anyone who was hostile to glorious disorder was not welcome. It was a wonder, then, how so stealthily and quietly, the most beautiful queen of the Jellicle Tribe had managed to slip away into a nook of the junk piles.

Even without the shine of old Christmas lights, her fur glowed scarlet. In the presence of Nobody and Nothing she maintained her regality, her lithe movement. She blinked in that experienced, teasing way that drove toms mad and made lesser queens jealous. It was both vanity and self-consciousness at work. Standing tall in the very side of the junkyard, staring under heavy and black-lashed lids, she confronted the silvery old cat who she'd caught staring at them from the corner.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"What a warm hello to your mother," the aged queen dryly replied. "Come nearer; let me see you, Bombalurina."

"We're not to be touched by outsiders," said the scarlet Jellicle bitingly. "…or traitors."

"Is that what they call me now?" Grizabella sighed, looking to the beaten ground. "How is your father? Is he still in theatre?"

Bombalurina stiffened, still regarding her with animosity. "What do you care about Father? He isn't your mate any longer."

"Don't be so rude with me," snapped Grizabella, narrowing her faded eyes. "I have a right to still know of him."

"You broke his heart."

"I left because it was in my nature," the old silver queen answered firmly.

"Nature!" Bombalurina laughed harshly. "That's ridiculous. You're ridiculous. Go away from our junkyard. Nobody wants to see you."

Grizabella sighed again. "You're exactly like me. In every way."

"I am _nothing _like you," said the younger queen. "I'm a Jellicle. I'm not a traitor."

"But you _are _a Glamour Cat." The words came from Grizabella's mouth like dust, flying out from a book long-kept but never opened. They were familiar, but unwelcome. "Like me, you are a Glamour Cat. It is in your nature, as it is in mine."

"I am nothing like you," Bombalurina repeated, but it sounded less rigid. "I won't go your way, ever."

"It's not whether you want to," Grizabella said dimly. "It is in your fate. Inescapable. You grow as a rose among grass. You escape from other's cages. You keep secrets beneath smiles. You do the best in your worst. You bring the proud to their knees."

Bombalurina stared at her mother, her eyes glinting through the dark. "Is that what you did?"

"With great regret," she nodded, and as the music from the Ball grew louder she began to slink away, slowly. "I hope the tribe will accept me back tonight. Even as Glamour Cats, we have consciences, my darling."

"You're wrong about me," called out Bombalurina sharply. "I'm nothing like that."

"You're a rose among grass," Grizabella called back, disappearing into the black.

The Jellicle Ball carried on.

* * *

_Three Months Later_

The junkyard was dreary. Ugly, even. While humans no longer came to dump their garbage, the Jellicles had admittedly grown to be rather spoiled and simply tossed their items anywhere they pleased. When the amount of space in the central clearing had been reduced by roughly a third, Jennyanydots decided to do something about it.

Rallying the help of Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer, the only cats who were allowed to go out of the territory, they gathered loose soil from ruined gardens and placed it around the perimeter of the junkyard. From there, the Gumbie Cat grew roses.

Amidst the usual black and blue and gray of the junk piles sprung deep red and green. The blossoms grew upwards and curled around the fence wire, their scent reminding the Jellicles how musty the real junkyard actually smelled, and making them grateful. Humans were partly baffled to see flowers around the decrepit yard, and some scoffed, and some admired, but soon as time went by opinions mattered less and the area came to be simply known as it simply was: a junkyard with roses.

* * *

"…and then remember that time we tried to pull the fence apart, when we were younger?" the Rum Tum Tugger said, lying on his back atop the tire and staring up at the sky. "We were trying to make some kinda door, and Munkus got so mad that he told Uncle Skimble and we ended up having to polish the wire. Again."

"When was the last time he forced us to polish it?" asked Bombalurina. She was lying on the tire with the lanky, golden Maine Coon, her head beside his. "I think it was more than a year ago, when we were teenagers. We made baby Victoria cry because we told her that her fur would turn black soon."

Tugger let out a laugh, brushing a hand through the fur on the side of his head. His fingers made slight contact with her scarlet fur, meshing it partly along with his. "We were such bullies. Everyone hated us."

"And now everyone _loves _you," Bombalurina snorted. "You're the reason the queen-kittens were willing to go through puberty. I forget that exact moment you went from pest to pleasure. Neither do the elders, really. They still hate you."

"Ah, they don't matter," Tugger waved a lazy hand at the endless sky. "They only matter if everyone agrees with them about me."

"What if I did?" Bombalurina sat up, and smirked at her best friend.

"You could never possibly hate _me_." Trademark arrogance.

"Of course not. You're like a brother to me."

Tugger groaned. "That's the worst possible thing you could say to any tom, Bombie."

The red queen laughed and turned to gaze at the roses that were tangled through the fence wire. "What can I say? If you have your power with moves, I have my power with words."

"That still makes me the winner – actions speak louder than words," replied the Tugger, charmingly. "…and I happen to be a _great _man of action."

Bombalurina suddenly felt his tongue graze the side of her cheek, and she jerked away as far as possible.

"Jerk," she muttered aloud, and Tugger began to laugh hard at her.

* * *

The medic's den was a sore fit for a junkyard – it was to be kept sterile as possible. Bombalurina stared blankly at its walls, draped with clean old sheets.

"A little more, darling," Jennyanydots said to the black-and-golden queen on the makeshift bed. "Just push a little more."

Demeter's face was teary with pain; the tender bulge at her belly seemed to burn with writhing life. Bombalurina stood in front of her, holding a warm blanket ready for the fourth kitten of her litter.

When finally the last kitten slid out, quiet as a cloud, Bombalurina brought a practiced slap to its rear, causing it to breathe its first breath and to howl loudly at the world. She wiped away the remaining blood, as Jennyanydots had taught her, and carried the silver kitten, striped with black and gold, to Demeter's side where the rest of its siblings lay.

"It's a girl," Bombalurina said to Demeter, who was lying exhausted on the bed. "What would you like to name her?"

"Myrtle," the new mother breathed, slowly. "We'll name her Myrtle."

Bombalurina nodded and – laying Myrtle aside Silas and Ambrose and Newton – she sighed.

This was duller than she'd wanted her life to be.

"Thank you so much, Bombalurina," Jennyanydots plodded over to her side, patting her shoulder. "You took care of this litter well. Delightful Gumbie Cat work."

"You're welcome," the scarlet queen replied mechanically.

"J-Jenny," said Demeter weakly. "Is Munkustrap here? Can I show them to him?"

"He'll come in a while, dear," the Gumbie Cat replied, and then turned to Bombalurina. "Could you please go out and take a rose from the fence? She needs something to smell to keep her awake."

Without another word Bombalurina nodded, and promptly walked out of the medic's den.

* * *

In honesty she was bored by her existence as a midwife apprentice. She watched new life hesitantly bloom, while her own flitted away without incident.

Stepping down the rocky incline of the heap, she gently inhaled and did what the elders used to tell her and her friends to do as kittens – concentrate on the better part of her life.

She was no longer Macavity's mate. After what he'd done to Demeter, how could she be? Their passion had been exciting, fleeting – but dangerous nonetheless.

She was kept sane by the time spent with her best friend, the Rum Tum Tugger. Undeniably they were so alike – flirty, and rambunctious, and possessing a view of life that was both cheerful and loaded with sarcasm. After all, life was a celebration and they were the guests, they both believed.

The scarlet queen sauntered over to a side of the fence, where the clusters of roses were thickest. She lightly brushed her hand over the brambles, feeling for the flower with the softest petals, even though that wasn't required.

Finding an especially large, fully bloomed one, she dug her fingers underneath and pulled it out, the stem snapping loudly. As she did, she heard a rustle from outside, and distracted, pressed the pad of her finger into a thorn.

"_Shit_," she hissed under her breath. As she transferred the flower to her other hand she saw a dark new red spring out from the tip of her finger, glistening lightly under the sun.

She heard a rustle again, and looked up. Standing mere feet away from the junkyard, vague as the air, was a cat.

Bombalurina blinked, astonished. For the longest time, she hadn't seen a cat who wasn't a Jellicle. The outsider had charcoal fur, but sparks of deep orange peeked out from underneath. Unlike the head fur of that of the Jellicles, that made sure to keep them above neck level, his own fell wildly past his shoulders, unkempt.

His eyes were an untamed yellow.

Soon as Bombalurina blinked again, the outsider had turned and darted away, quick as the blood that bloomed from her hand.


	2. You Grow as a Rose Among Grass

AUTHOR'S NOTE: School is exhausting and I only ever have time to update on weekends. Le sigh. Anyway, this chapter was QUITE enjoyable to write, ah hurr hurr hurr. Have fun miladies. 8D

* * *

**Wild Rose**

**CHAPTER 2

* * *

**

Maybe it was out of habit or out of a new insecurity, but Bombalurina found herself staring into a mirror again. It lay, frameless and broken, at a corner of her den. She'd smuggled it into her home after she'd found it from the last haul of garbage brought in, which was more than three years ago.

Frowning, she twisted one way to another to find the most perfect curve to line her body, to dip slightly at the small of her back and stretch back out at the beginning of her legs. She lifted her tail and bent it, to look playful.

The fur on her head had grown longer, had begun to bend downwards gently with gravity. Locks fell to cover her eyes, if she tilted her head right. It was uncharacteristic of her to keep her mane so untidy, but uncombed it gave this rebellious, brazen look, which she found she quite liked.

Her fur, aglow in its famed scarlet, was a swirl of spots and lines. She was wild, and like all Jellicles was not owned by a human, and she especially loved to flaunt that. The washes of red reminded Bombalurina of her early life with her mother, Grizabella, who originally was the same color of deep fire. Her own coat, it seemed, was destined to fade to the same dusty silver, and in a sudden moment of worry she lifted a hand to touch her as-of-yet unwrinkled face.

The queen noticed the faint cut on her finger, from when she'd picked a rose yesterday.

Bombalurina was _not _superstitious. The younglings of the Jellicles were encouraged not to be, though the older ones secretly kept to some of their old ways. Making sure to face the direction of the moonrise when sleeping, killing a mouse with only the claws on the left never hurt nobody.

_But that cat…_

It _must _have meant something. But what? Turning away (and inspecting the grace of her twirl), Bombalurina left her mirror to search out the only cats who probably knew.

* * *

The identical pair of cats sat composedly on the car hood, both sharing the same stare of nothing across the junkyard. Curled up in between them, Bombalurina saw, was a dark, restless young queen who absentmindedly pawed at the male twin's slow, swaying tail.

"Coricopat, Tantomile," called out the scarlet queen, climbing up to the edge of the hood. "How is your day?"

Tantomile, the female twin, directed her gaze at her, softening from thoughtful to pleasant. "It's nice," she said simply.

"You'd think that by now, Jennyanydots would rescue a few roses to keep in her den," said Coricopat, looking over to Bombalurina as well. "The impending storm won't stop to think of them."

"I wouldn't mind rescuing a few," piped up the little queen, lifting her head from Coricopat's lap. Her blue eyes were wide and fascinated. "They're so beautiful to look at. And Coricopat, you should get some too. Maybe they'll make you smile more."

"I'm content with how much I smile, Jemima," replied the tom, with only a reserved pat behind her ear. "Concentrate on your meditation."

Jemima, ever since her trance at the Jellicle Ball, had become Tantomile and Coricopat's apprentice of sorts in the art of clairvoyance. Her progress was slow and as of yet she'd not experienced a vision, but the twins still kept her as a student. Bombalurina couldn't figure out whether it was out of determination or affection.

"It's so hard to," Jemima scowled. "Especially on this beautiful day."

"Concentrate," Coricopat repeated, and the queen dejectedly dropped her head back onto his lap, squeezing her eyes shut as if forcing the peace of mind to come quicker.

"What are you here for, Bombalurina?" Tantomile asked, turning back to her. "I know we're friends, but no one comes to us these days without questions."

"Oh… I'm sorry," the scarlet queen stepped back slightly.

"No, there's nothing wrong with that. Ours is a dying art. Go on."

"I saw a cat yesterday," Bombalurina began, and then she hesitated a little. "Well, an outsider. He was mostly black. Some orange. Looked rather wild."

"What was he doing?" asked Coricopat.

"Nothing. We just stared at each other. Then he turned and ran away," she realized how insignificant the entire event sounded. She lowered her eyes, embarrassed. "It just made me worried. I mean, what if he was a spy? One of Macavity's?"

"It doesn't sound too dangerous," Coricopat replied. "And I'm sure we'll come up with some sort of analysis if _you would just stop squeezing me like that_-"

Jemima giggled, her arms latched on around the tom's waist as she lay at his side. "I'm sorry! You're just so funny and cute when you talk and I just want to hug you!" She broke into a playful laugh.

"We each deal with our own worries," said Tantomile to Bombalurina. (Was that a tiny bit of _sarcasm _she sensed in the Mystic's voice?) "But all this event tells me is that your sense of observation has increased. Plenty of outsiders pass by the junkyard all the time. I'm sorry, Bombalurina. I suggest you don't fret over it."

The scarlet queen sighed a little. "I suppose you're right. I should be going now, anyway. Cassandra's having kits and Jenny needs me over."

"While you're there, tell her about her roses," Coricopat told her. "She needs to get a few to replant before the storm next week."

"Can you ask her to get _me _a rose?" asked Jemima.

"Back to your meditation, student, and don't say a word," commanded Coricopat, but in an uncharacteristically mild way. The queen groaned and hid her eyes behind her hands, curling back up between them sulkily.

Bombalurina turned to jump off the car hood. "Goodbye, you guys."

"Goodbye, Bombalurina," the twins answered, eerily in sync.

"Bye-bye," called out Jemima as the scarlet queen ambled away, earning her another soft smack on the head from Coricopat.

* * *

"Rina, dear," Jennyanydots said as the queen walked into the medic's den, padding up to her. "I'm sorry to call you. The litter doesn't seem to be ready just yet – maybe tomorrow. Could you help me put back the water?"

Bombalurina was about to reply, but the Gumbie Cat scurried off, distracted, twittering to herself different reminders. She turned her head to see the regal Abyssinian, reclining on the bed, her figure a sleek, sharp line, save for the maternal roundness of her belly. Sitting on a stool beside her, his elbows resting on his knees, was her mate, Alonzo, who looked wearily up at the scarlet from the ground.

Alonzo, improperly handsome. His black and white patches were not the most admired coat in the tribe, but it was in his movements, in the impudent tilt of his brow that made Bombalurina swoon. She had a past with him (then again, she had a past with Admetus… Plato… Mungojerrie… on and on), if warm nights and hurried meetings could be considered a past. They stopped after she noticed the way he stared at Cassandra. If Bombalurina was anything, she was perceptive, and he was in love.

"Are you alright?" she asked, nodding at the dark queen.

"A little tired," replied Cassandra, her head slightly sunken into the pillow. "It's a challenge to carry these kittens each day."

Bombalurina figured it was a challenge for Alonzo, too – to go all those months with nothing but a rigid, pregnant queen to lie next to every night. The poor thing probably wasn't built for faithfulness.

Feeling sorry for him, Bombalurina bent over at the side of the bed, pretending to talk closer to Cassandra, while rewarding the black-and-white tom with a generous view of her curves. She could nearly sense the shift in his posture, the sudden lifting of his eyes and ears.

"So round," she pretended to be interested in Cassandra's belly. "It looks to be about five kittens. Do you have names planned?"

The Abyssinian shifted to look at her, her icy eyes for once gentle and tired. "Well, only two. One of the boys will be named Leander, and one of the girls will be Rowena. We'll figure out the rest once we see them."

Bombalurina nodded. Then, she smiled inwardly to herself. Cassandra, majestic, elegant Cassandra, was now reduced to the obscurity of motherhood, no longer her competition in the junkyard. She was still beautiful, yes, but unlike Bombalurina she'd lost the freedom to charm toms at will.

"Bombalurina," called Jennyanydots, returning into the medic's den. "I'm sorry to have kept you for so long. You may go now. Alonzo, Cassandra, you too."

"Thanks, Jenny," Alonzo replied, standing from his chair. Bombalurina straightened up as lithely as she could, so that he'd notice what he was missing. The sudden stiffness in his posture suggested he did, but he had to snap out of his daze to help his mate off the bed.

"I hope you've been well, Lonz," Bombalurina said, keeping her eyes on him in a perfect sideways glance.

The tom shot her a silent, wide stare – this was dangerous territory to flirt in.

"Oh, and Rina," Jennyanydots suddenly piped up, and held out a few damp rags. "Could you please put these outside? I need them to dry."

Bombalurina sighed. How did that Gumbie Cat always manage to make her appear so unglamorous at the worst of times?

"Of course, Jenny," she replied with forced cheerfulness, taking the cloths into her arms.

She regarded Cassandra with a nod, and Alonzo with a deeper, more languid one, and the daughter of the Glamour Cat sauntered out of the medic's den.

* * *

"_Hello, Mungojerrie."_

_The calico tom looked up to see her leaning against a junk pile, a mysterious smile on her lips. The sun brought with it sweltering heat, and he shielded his eyes from its glare._

"_Oh, Bomb'rina. Swell to see ya." It hardly was – he was currently on his knees, gathering the soil to put against the fence for Jennyanydots' roses. He looked undignified, and even thieves had their dignity. _Why _couldn't she have come when he was all nice and clean?_

"_What are you doing?" the gorgeous queen asked, bending down to look at the soil and affording Mungojerrie an absolutely luxurious view. "This isn't for Jenny's plan to grow flowers, is it?"_

"_It sorry is," Mungojerrie smirked a bit, brushing the fur away from his eyes. "Milady needs 'er soil packed up tightly, she says."_

"_How gentlemanly of you to do it for her," Bombalurina laughed sultrily. "What a waste for a body like yours, though. To be resigned to gardening…"_

_He didn't know if her breath lightly touching his face was on purpose or out of her misjudgment of the distance between them, but it wasn't helping. She had to look so _gorgeous _all the time and here he was knee-deep in dirt and covered in sweat because it had to be so hot-_

"_What're ya doin' here, Bomba?" asked Mungojerrie, looking up straight into her eyes. They regarded each other with just as much determination to overpower. "Sure ya got better things t'do than watch a bloke work…"_

_The scarlet queen lifted her head slightly; she let her lips brush a breadth away from Mungojerrie's forehead. Sweet Bast above, how could this be happening? Wasn't she just with Alonzo a week ago… or Pouncival… or Plato…_

"_Is that what you want me to do, Jerrie?" she whispered. The movement of her lips tickled his skin, lightly. "You just want me to leave?"_

_With her standing so close it was like an everyday steal for an everyday thief. Just reach out, just grab. Consequences were for cowards._

"_Hell no," he replied, and orange enveloped red._

_Gathering the soil took much longer._

* * *

Bombalurina was lonely. It was impossible to wrap her head around it, but everyone else had since gone and paired off and grew up and there she was. It had been so long since she was last with someone. There were those certain trysts, and close encounters, but she was never _with _someone.

She stepped out to the side of the junkyard, forgetting the rags she was holding and staring out at the same alley she'd seen the wild cat in yesterday. It was empty and black. What did she expect, _two _cats this time?

She was about to move on and hang the rags, when in the dark of the alley the glint of two yellow eyes flashed in less than a second.

"Bombie! I figured I'd find you here. What-"

"See that!" the scarlet queen exclaimed as she dropped the cloths, grasping the wire of the fence through the rose stems. "See that? It was him again! The same one!"

She turned her head frantically, to see Tugger standing behind her, looking surprised. He squinted through the fence.

"I don't see anything," he said simply.

Bombalurina rolled her eyes. "You act like you're so helpful."

"But I _don't_ see anything!" the Tugger shrugged.

Bombalurina gripped the wires tightly, staring out across the maze of streets. They stretched forever past the buildings in sight, past what was visible from the inside of the junkyard.

"Tugger… have you ever wanted to get out of here?"

The lanky Maine Coon bent down and placed his chin on one of her shoulders, gazing casually at the city. He was silent for a long time, and Bombalurina wondered if she'd said something that a Jellicle would consider disturbing.

"All the time," came his reply, and the scarlet queen relaxed her grip of the fence.

"Damn it, Tugger. I'm going to go crazy in here."

The tom lifted his head and moved to her side, resting an elbow on her shoulder.

"Beat ya to it," he answered, and through the wires and brambles of roses they stared.


	3. You Escape from Other's Cages

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Sorry this took so long! School has been horrible. Lucky for me, after this week will be our semester break, so that's two weeks off! OOOH YEEEEH.

So this one's mostly exposition, exposition, and the establishment of a plot I hope y'all will like. :D :D Enjoy!

* * *

**Wild Rose**

**CHAPTER 3

* * *

**

"_And then, and then that's when I took hold of that rope," croaked her father to the listening kits. As he reached out, grabbing for an imaginary object, she could hear his bones creak. "I took hold of it, and I swung – swung – clean across the stage, from one platform to the next. The mechanical crocodiles below, they snapped, and they snapped, but I tucked both my legs in-" her father squatted, his eyes meeting those of the younglings' – "tucked them in, like this, see, so their jaws could not graze my toes."_

"_But then how'd you save the Princess?" a wide-eyed Etcetera asked._

"_We're not yet quite there, my little dear. Firefrorefiddle still had plenty o' enemies to get past. They weren't real actors, no blood, no bone. They were painted cutouts – the director had spent all his money on the mechanical crocodiles – painted cutouts nailed to poles, and raised up high by a couple of stagehands. I took my sword, I jabbed at them, jabbed jabbed jabbed, and they each fell over, one by one, in time. The audience were always on their feet by this time, they'd be out of their seats, they'd be shouting, Firefrorefiddle! Fight strong, Firefrorefiddle!"_

"_But then how'd you save the Princess?" Victoria urged him to continue._

"_Ah, well, she was trapped in that cage, you see, barred from the Fiend for she was made of clouds, while Fiddle was made of grass and stone. My costume, it was made of green fabric with heavy stones at the shoulders. Hers… it was of silk, made to flow at her most miniscule movement. I jumped down from the platform, and I ran with my legs and my heart, and I wrenched the Princess free from inside that cage! The audience roared with praise!"_

_Bombalurina drew her knees to her chin, sitting farther back in the shadows as she listened. This is the bad part, she remembered._

_Gus directed his foggy eyes to the moon. "…I made history when I played Firefrorefiddle. I was a star. I was in my prime. I was with…"_

_He lifted a shaky hand to the stars notched into the night sky, chillingly quiet._

_Bombalurina could see what he saw. He could see her, the Princess of Clouds, the queen he would save onstage every evening so many years ago. His beloved actress. His partner._

_Their shared dream faded in an instant, and the Theatre Cat brought his palm to his face as he tried to hide his tears._

* * *

"The Thieves will be out hunting tonight."

The Rum Tum Tugger looked up lazily from the tin can he'd been pawing. "What was that?"

"I _said_, the Thieves will be out hunting tonight."

The tom blinked sleepily, as if he was slowly processing the information. "Um, yeah. Today is Wednesday. Food scout day."

The scarlet queen rolled from on top of her back to her stomach, ending up right beside Tugger. "You know what that means? The gate will be open tonight."

"They leave it open? How did you know that?"

"Mungojerrie told me." It was only Tugger who would know that "told" meant several more things than just _"told"._

The Maine Coon turned his head to look at the main gate to the west. "And what do you propose we do about that?" he asked, visibly interested.

Bombalurina paused. She hadn't rehearsed a way to make her plan sound appealing. "I suppose we could try and escape. See the city, like we wanted."

Their eyes locked for a single, incomprehensible moment, and then Tugger closed his and snorted.

"What, what is it?" asked Bombalurina.

"You're still thinking about escaping."

"So? You've always wanted to, also."

"I know, I know," Tugger smirked. Their shoulders were planted against each other, as they lay on the tire. "It's just that… you were never one for commitment."

"You _bastard_. You slimy bastard. Like you are."

"But I _am _committed! I am!"

"Alright. What's the longest time you've been with a queen?"

"It depends on how early in the night we start," he replied with a lazy grin.

Bombalurina promptly lifted her hand, took the tip of his closest ear between her fingers, and yanked him down hard. His head followed, and his elbow, resting on the tire, slipped out from under him.

"_Ow_!" he said, predictably. "Okay, okay, I'm a sleazebag too! We can both be sleazebags."

The scarlet queen smiled triumphantly, letting him go. "So, are we getting out of the junkyard tonight, or did you make a previous commitment with someone else?"

"You, baby," Tugger groaned, rubbing his ear. "And you know it."

* * *

Bombalurina walked, quiet as possible, to the only gate out of the Jellicle junkyard. The padlock that held it closed was five feet above her, and even if she could climb the wire and vines to reach it, she still wouldn't have the key. No, the only cat to have the pleasure of owning that, of owning the perpetual opportunity to go outside, was Mungojerrie for his and Rumpleteazer's thief work, and for all her charm - natural or practiced - there was no way she could coax the key away from him. She just had to wait until tonight.

The queen pushed away the tangled stems to peer through the fence. Besides the dusty roundabout that encircled the perimeter of the junkyard, a long, endless road branched out from it, leading to the larger parts of the city. To the east of that, she remembered, was the alleyway she was intending to go to. It was where she'd seen that outsider.

"Rina?"

She swerved around, scared that she'd been caught in the act of plotting her escape. No, it wasn't a tribe sentinel and, thank Everlasting Cat, it wasn't _Munkustrap_.

"Mima, I'm surprised to find you here," said Bombalurina, relaxing. "Wouldn't you be playing with the other kittens by now?"

The young queen smiled, with her hands linked politely in front her. "I already did. I just wanted to take this hour to practice my meditating for Coricopat and Tantomile."

Bombalurina tilted her head to one side, gazing at Jemima in wonder. It was rare to see responsibility in a kitten, let alone a Jellicle one, but she knew she was usually judgmental and decided to brush the surprise away. "That's nice, Mimes. That would make them proud to have you as their apprentice."

Jemima's smile suddenly drooped, and she kicked bashfully at some dust on the ground. "I sure would hope so. They almost always get mad at me."

This was no time to relax and converse with someone, but Bombalurina decided to go along with it so she wouldn't look suspicious for hanging by the gate.

"Oh, that can't be true," she pouted theatrically.

"It is! It is," Jemima's eyes widened, and she lowered her voice to a gossiper's twittering whisper. "They tell me to sit and meditate, and if I so much as lift an eyelid, _yap yap yap _they go. One time Tantomile fell into a trance, and I needed to ask her a question so I held her nose so she'd have to wake up, and _yap yap yap _she went. And one time, I called Coricopat 'Pattie', and – well – he didn't go yap yap yap. He didn't speak to me for three days."

Bombalurina couldn't help but laugh. She was friends with the Twins, and they were mostly sullen or expressionless, but she'd never seen them grumpy. "You know what, Jemima? It sounds like they really like you."

"You think?" asked the darker queen, gloomily. "I'm an awful student. I can't keep still, I always get them mad and I haven't made any progress."

"Really now? I figured your trance during the Jellicle Ball was a jumpstart."

"No, no," Jemima shook her head. "When you go into a trance, there's no vision or seeing the future or whatever. It's just a _feeling_. It's like having a dream but still seeing what's actually in front of you. Coricopat just held Tantomile's hand, and then Tantomile put her hand in mine and I just _felt_. There were no visions. I haven't had one yet."

The little queen hung her head in kittenish shame and, with nothing else to contribute, Bombalurina awkwardly reached out and patted her on the shoulder.

"Things will get better, I promise. You'll get that vision soon."

"You're so nice to me, Rina," Jemima sniffed. "If I ever have my vision, I hope it's something about you, because you're my idol."

Bombalurina gazed at her, a little sadly. "I'm hardly someone to idolize, Mima."

* * *

Evening at last. The two cats hid discreetly in the shadows of the junk piles, watching the Thieves saunter across the clearing towards the gate.

"They keep the gate open once they leave," explained the scarlet queen. "Once they're far enough, we can run out."

"Then where do we go?" asked Tugger, craning his head to keep watch.

"To – to the alley where I saw the cat."

"Is _that_ what this is all about?"

"_Well_, Tugger," Bombalurina scowled. "If you have anything else in mind then by _all means_."

"Okay, okay," he submitted, and flicked a finger across her cheek to signify the apology he was probably too proud to verbalize. "Well, there they go."

Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer, entirely oblivious to the two spies, trod over the worn road, scouting for food as they'd been assigned. Without even waiting for a _go_ Bombalurina and Tugger sprinted from their hiding spot.

_Let this happen let this happen let this happen_.

The gate didn't miraculously swing closed. The Thieves didn't whip around and spot the escapers. As Bombalurina's feet stumbled out and touched the outside pavement for the first time in her life, the Everlasting Cat didn't strike with lightning. She stared at the sudden expanse of the world around her, astounded.

"I can't believe it," she heard Tugger's voice close behind her. "We're out! Holy shit."

Well, it was better than _she _could have articulated. Promptly the queen took Tugger's wrist in her hand, and began to pull him down the road.

"Could you believe if the others found out?" Tugger went on. "We'd be in so much trouble. All of that shunning and moaning about breaking our law and Munkus will _finally _have the pleasure of dismembering me like he'd always promised and – could you not _hold me so hard?_"

"Don't be such a kitten," snapped Bombalurina, but loosened her grip anyway. The alleyway, dark as charcoal, didn't seem at all inviting. Even then, she _had _to find out. What else did she know to do in a city?

There was a nearly invisible movement in the dark of the alley. Something orange shifted.

_He's there_, a voice screamed in Bombalurina's head. She began to walk faster, still gripping Tugger's hand.

"I said not so hard!" he whined.

To the right of the alleyway something suddenly flickered. Feet above them, a neon sign hanging over the door blinked, sputtered – before finally setting with a blinding bright-green. The scarlet queen was rushing, but the sign unmistakably read _NO MAN'S LAND_.

They screeched to a stop in front of the alleyway.

At first, it was as black as it had been from the distance. Then, a door swung open; an unusual light poured blindingly out. It looked much too small for a human. In fact, the stranger cat that had opened it seemed to have to crouch just to fit.

His fur was black with glints of orange.

"Well, fancy that," the stranger broke the silence, snapped both Bombalurina and Tugger out of their shock from hearing a foreign voice. "We have a couple of new'uns. Come right in, friends."

Bombalurina stared at him. She suspected she looked less graceful than usual that way, but she couldn't help it.

"Well, don't be shy, pretties. Come join us in the No Man's."

As the black tom disappeared into the entrance, Tugger, in his first movement since they had stopped running, leaned in close to Bombalurina to whisper, "Did he just call _both _of us pretty?"

She flicked his attempt at humor away, and wordlessly walked towards the door.

"Bombie," said Tugger, behind her. "What in the hell are you doing? We don't know these guys."

"We're in the outside," she replied. "It's not like we'll know anybody at all." Bombalurina leaned forward and took his hand again, and they both walked hesitantly in.

The inside of the _No Man's Land _was dim. It seemed absolutely ancient – the walls were cracked and unpainted, and thin enough to hear the low buzz of voices from the humans' side of the bar. To the left was the counter, and the aged bartender behind it did not even acknowledge them with a flick of his tatty ear, busy pouring water into some unidentifiable drink.

At least, the rest of the patrons looked happy to be there, and they turned to look at the Jellicles with smiles.

"Ey, you weren't wrong about the 'pretties'-"

"Bloody hell, I've never seen you two before-"

"No matter! Come join us. We're all's a friend-"

"Welcome to the No Man's Land," the outsider tom looked warmly at the two stunned cats. "We're a little cranny in the corner the humans' bar, but strike me with lightning if we haven't got twice their spirit."

Tugger looked around warily. "There doesn't seem to be much spirit here, actually."

"It's a Wednesday, nobody comes on Wednesdays," the black tom waved his remark away, and then brought his hand down. "My name is Peter."

The scarlet queen was the first to lift her hand and shake his. "Bombalurina," she said, without hesitation.

The scruffy bartender at the counter suddenly looked up, seeming astonished. His fur was faded gray, but was covered in jagged brown stripes.

"Bombalurina, you say?" he croaked, still grasping a glass of watered down liquid. "That's your name?"

She blinked, confused. "Yes, that's my name."

The bartender's yellowed eyes seemed to glow, and he suddenly closed them as he burst into laughter. Peter, Bombalurina, and Tugger all simply stood there, baffled as the cat's voice cracked with glee.

"Augustus! Augustus, bosun!" the bartender cackled, motioning at another old tom sitting sleepily in his stool. "Look who we've found! Bella's little girl!"

"_Bella's little girl?_" repeated Tugger, in disbelief. He craned his head to his friend. "You _know _these guys?"

"I don't," answered Bombalurina, sounding just as stunned. "Listen, I've never been out of the Jellicle junkyard. I don't know who you've mistaken me for-"

"Oh no, pretty, we haven't mistaken you at all," the bartender rasped, in a toothless grin. "You're Bombalurina, our dear good Grizabella's pride and joy."

The sound of her mother's name made her heart jump. The scarlet queen swallowed, her eyes still wide as moons. "Is this… is this the same Grizabella I know?"

"Famed Glamour Cat, actress and star, fur as red as blood," Peter nodded, leaning against the counter. "I was too young to ever meet her, but she's practically legend. No wonder you struck me as familiar when I first saw you through the Jellicle fence."

Bombalurina suddenly felt herself blush, to hear that Peter still remembered staring at her through the rose vines.

"Name's Grumbuskin," the bartender piped up, sliding two full glasses towards the pair of Jellicles. "I been a bartender since your mother frequented the No Man's. She was a sweetheart, in truth. Well, more accurate's a flirt, but we gentlemen liked her fine. But I'm not here to bore you pretties with my history. Go, drink, on the house."

Bombalurina and Tugger took one uncertain look at each other, and then shrugged; this was just another day in their celebration of life, after all. They each took a glass, downed them in a gulp, and began to cough violently.

"Ah, right, first-timers you both," Grumbuskin nodded sympathetically. "We add water to the gin to die it down, but it's still strong as fire, don't ya reckon?"

"Wh-what_- hluch_- is _gin_?" Tugger gagged.

"Right, right. Jellicles you both. You've heard of nothing in that junkyard but milk and dancing and cookies."

"_Aaachh_- what are _cookies_?" choked Bombalurina, gripping her throat as it burned with hostility towards the unfamiliar liquor.

"I guess those are enough surprises for the night," Peter suddenly said, and put a friendly hand on their shoulders to assist them on the way out. "Please, come by again tomorrow night, and on Friday night, too, so you can see just how much spirit we have."

"Um-" Bombalurina managed to battle out the burn in her mouth to crane her head towards Peter, just as they were going out the door. "Sure, thanks."

The black tom gave them a friendly smile, and stepped back to let them close the door. Behind him, Grumbuskin's croaky voice called out, "We'll see you again, Bella's little girl!"

Again, it was Bombalurina and Tugger left in the alleyway.

It was silent at first, until the Maine Coon finally said, "See? They called _both _of us pretty."

"They knew my mother," said the scarlet queen, gazing at the closed door.

The black-and-gold tom threw an arm around her shoulder. "You _did _tell me that she went out of the junkyard all the time. She probably came here."

Bombalurina nodded slowly, and then turned to look at him. "Is it alright if we… if we come back here tomorrow evening?"

Tugger shrugged. "We're in trouble already. Why not?"

_Right_, she remembered. _You're still part of the strictest tribe in London_.

"We'd better go back," the queen held her hand out for Tugger to take it, and they began to walk slowly back to the junkyard.

From the corner of her eye, she could still see the neon letters _NO MAN'S LAND_, high and bright, flickering on and off.


	4. You Keep Secrets Beneath Smiles

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Oh dang! Sorry this chapter took so long. I got twelve days off from school, yes, but I also got one horribly unsexy bout of writer's block. Not cool. Anyway, enjoy the new chapter, and thanks for all your reviews! I've been busy so I haven't been able to reply lately... BUT THIS TIME I WILL! I SWEAR!

* * *

**Wild Rose**

**CHAPTER 4

* * *

**

A human's siren blaring far away made Bombalurina awake with a start. She found herself curled up in some crevice of a junk pile, the lingering warmth beside her suggesting that Tugger had shortly since risen and gone.

She cringed at the throbbing of a slight headache. _Where did _that _come from?_

From _The_ _No Man's Land_, obviously.

It struck her - as she lay in her spot hidden from sun - that she had escaped from the Jellicle junkyard last night. She'd gone off to that decrepit little bar in the side of the alley, and met cats she'd never known, but knew _her_. Her feet had touched foreign dust.

Technically, she was now a traitor. And yet, she was very much at peace.

* * *

_Bombalurina, young, energetic, willful adolescent, sat sulkily on the floor, picking off the tiny flecks of bright green paint that had dried on her fur. That Macavity was a right git, he was, for daring her to jump into that old paint can that he swore was empty. "Mostly empty," he'd said after. What a right git._

_Her father, a handsome and animated tom, stood at the entrance of their den, reciting Hamlet to the Jellicle moon. Wrapped around his neck was a smooth vermillion scarf – the mark of an actor, he would always say._

"_To sleep, perchance to dream… ay, there's the rub, for in that sleep of death what dreams may come… Rina, little darling, don't you go out to play at this hour?"_

"_I don't want to see Macavity," the young queen grumbled, flicking off the last of the neon green that rested on her shoulder._

"_Go on with Demeter, then. I see her in the clearing right now."_

"_It's okay," she answered, without looking up to face him. "She likes to be alone sometimes."_

"_Then how about your other friend, Tugger?"_

"_Please no, daddy. He's so annoying," Bombalurina frowned, but maybe that was her self-consciousness talking – she _did _have a bit of a crush him, however little she wanted to admit it. Well, that and they had tried to pull apart the fence that afternoon to escape, and were found out by Uncle Skimbleshanks and punished._

"_But then you'll be all alone tonight," Gus said, but slicked back the fur on his head, and laughed as if he didn't mind. "I have to go down to the theater now… would you believe what a special little princess you are? Your parents are the only ones allowed outside the junkyard. Don't you think you'll be allowed as well, one day?"_

_The little scarlet queen replied with a silent, noncommittal shrug. She began to nurse the fur on her tail, hardened from being coated in paint._

"_Ah, we'll see," her father turned away from the Jellicle moon to face her, his fists dramatically at his hips. "Time to go. Where's your mother?"_

_Bombalurina paused, and slowly looked up. The rest of the junkyard seemed to go quiet, as she searched her father's face for any trace of humor. She inhaled a bit, the tip of her tail still resting in her hand._

"_I don't know."_

_The smile from his face faded. Bombalurina watched him forego his heroic posture and dash to another room of their den to find her mother, to check for any sight of deep scarlet fur just like hers. She could hear his feet thud frantically through their den, and his smooth voice calling out Grizabella, Bella, Grizabella, but the young queen continued to pick paint off her tail because what kittens loved to do best was pretend that nothing was wrong._

_Her father finally reappeared, a glint of fear in his eyes. He was panting hard, and all Bombalurina could do was sit silently on the ground with her tail in her hand._

"_Where's your mother?" he repeated, this time breathlessly, but did not even stand and wait for an answer._

_He ran quickly out of their den, calling Grizabella, Bella, Grizabella. Bombalurina was all alone, and she tried with all her might to pretend that nothing was wrong._

* * *

Coricopat and Tantomile sat in the same place they always did, atop the car hood. In between them was a sleeping Jemima, cozily curled up. With a hand to her head to sooth the ache, Bombalurina approached them warily.

"Good morning," she managed to make her first words of the day sound casual, normal.

"Good morning," the twins replied in unison, but kept their gaze away from her.

The scarlet queen tilted her head slightly to watch Jemima sleep. "You finally found a way to make her stop bothering you?"

Coricopat nodded. "In a way. We found that forcing her to meditate possesses two possible outcomes. Either she doesn't concentrate at all and talks the entire day, or she concentrates so hard that she falls asleep."

Bombalurina smiled. "I'm sure things would get better if you treated her as less of an experiment and more as a friend."

"Jemima seems to favor that latter very vocally," replied the tom dryly.

"What's wrong, Bombalurina?" Tantomile asked. "You look rather troubled."

"Yes… about that," the scarlet queen blinked a couple of times, and then directed her gaze towards the ground, as her foot swept against the dust. "I'm not sure how to _put _it-"

"You went out, didn't you?" the female twin finished for her. "You went out of the junkyard."

Bombalurina looked back up, her expression sullen. "Well, damn. How were you able to figure it out? Read my mind? Fluctuations in my aura?"

"No, dear. You reek."

Bombalurina was taken aback. She lifted one of her hands, and sniffed at it. Bast! Dust and gin and dust and gin. She returned her stare to the twins, slightly offended. "Even then, you won't tell anybody, alright?"

"If you say so," Coricopat shrugged. "We pay no mind to tribe laws." Jemima made a content purr in her sleep.

She placed the hand she'd lifted onto her temple. "Everlasting Cat, I've got such a headache."

"That must be the gin," replied Tantomile.

Bombalurina opened her eyes. "…How do you know what _gin_ is?" To her knowledge, nothing but water and milk resided in the consumable liquid aspect of the Jellicle junkyard. "You didn't have your share of it before you joined the tribe, did you?"

Jemima jerked up slightly, and Coricopat absentmindedly extended a hand and placed it on her shoulder, soothing her back into sleep. "Before we found the Jellicles, we roamed, simple as that. You'd be surprised at how so desperately cats want to be like humans out there. They eat humans' food, they drink humans' drinks. Tantomile and I found several places that had smuggled in alcohol from shipments at the dock."

"But that says nothing of us," Tantomile continued. "You're still the only full Jellicle in the tribe who's left the junkyard. Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer's ability to go out forces them to forgo half their membership. While the two receive shelter and protection, they still can't have relationships with any full member."

Bombalurina bit her lip. Tantomile had hit somewhere, and she knew it. The Mystic brought her head lower to meet with the scarlet queen's gaze. "You're not still with him, are you?"

Bombalurina shook her head. "No. Macavity would have practically killed him if he found out."

"We are your friends," said Coricopat. "If anything happens, you can always come to us."

The scarlet queen turned to walk away. "Thank you, but it's alright. I want to handle this on my own."

"Maybe not so true," Tantomile called out to her. "Why else would you have come to us in the first place?"

Bombalurina didn't look back to answer, but it chilled her to the bone because she knew that they were right.

* * *

"Bombalurina." It was a voice that was painfully professional, yet incredibly tired.

She switched to a brisker walk; this was the last person she wanted to see in this sort of situation.

"Bombalurina," he called out again, and she decided that it would be too obvious if she ignored him.

The queen breathed, and turned around to look at her pursuer. "…Yes?" she replied, and put her hands on her hips, assuming the confident, casual stance that everyone expected from her.

Munkustrap stood tall in his spot. His face was free of emotion (even though it was passed around that he _was _a bit of a wreck sometimes). Munkustrap was one of the few toms Bombalurina had never been able to charm – Heaviside, why not? He was certainly handsome – but she tried her best to attribute it to his fierce loyalty to Demeter, and not to her own ineptitude. Glamour Cats had their pride.

"Jenny was looking for you yesterday," said the Jellicle Protector.

Bombalurina blinked, surprised. "But I _did _see her. And Cassandra's delivery was cancelled."

Munkustrap shook his head stiffly (why did he always want to act so austere all the time? She at least wanted him to consider her a _friend_). "She was looking for you after that." She supposed that her confusion was apparent; the Protector was gazing upon her with a bit of mercy. "Cassandra gave birth in the evening. Jenny needed your help."

The scarlet queen froze. Dear Bast, she was out of the junkyard by then, having a drink in _The No Man's Land_. How on earth did she reckon that there wasn't _some _kind of snag in the plan?

"It's alright, there's no punishment in that," Munkustrap told her suddenly, as if sensing her fear. "Her delivery went well, five healthy kittens. What we need to know is where you were."

_How convenient. _What could she say? She was staying with Demeter – no, Munkustrap would ask her and she would deny it. She was tired and sleeping in her den – no, they'd question her father and he'd say she was absent. Then Bombalurina realized that the Rum Tum Tugger would go with any excuse that she made – they were both guilty of the same thing, after all.

"I'm sorry, Munkus," the queen sighed dramatically, acting as the usual flirt. "I'd spent the night with my Tugger. I was simply out of reach_,_ and it's my fault. If you need anymore _information -"_

"No, no, that's enough," Munkustrap waved a hand at her, looking mildly uncomfortable. It was exactly the reaction she had hoped for. The Jellicle Protecter relaxed a little. "But thank you. We were just checking up on you."

She nodded with a smile. The next few seconds passed with the two of them standing there, Bombalurina exchanging a long stare with the handsome, stately tom. Finally she took a loud breath. "How are your kittens, Munkus? They're barely two days old, and here you are still at your post. It must be difficult."

Munkustrap's expression softened noticeably; a mention of his family seemed to put him at ease. "They're beautiful little things. They fight and meow all day and night, but Demeter and I don't mind. Except for Myrtle, that is – she's astoundingly quiet. She keeps to herself. We'll soon check with Jenny if there's a problem."

"I'm sure there isn't," she gave the tom a sweet look. "Now will that be all?"

The Protector realized that he'd forgone his usual leader-like stance, and cleared his throat, standing straight again. "Um, yes, that would be all. Goodbye, Bombalurina."

The queen bade him goodbye by flashing another glamorous smile and twirled around to leave. Only meters away it occurred to Bombalurina that she'd lied to one of the highest authorities in the junkyard.

_Just in the junkyard_, she reminded herself quickly. _One of the highest authorities in the junkyard, and not anywhere else._

* * *

"What was my mother like, Grumbuskin?" Bombalurina asked, idly turning around a glass of gin in her hand as she sat at the bar.

Sitting at the right of her inside the No Man's was a grinning Peter, ever-courteous yet ever-elusive, and sitting at her left was Tugger, holding his own drink and looking just about ready to fall asleep.

It was Thursday, and while it wasn't food scout day, escaping the junkyard again that night had been easier than back she and Tugger had once tried to pull apart a section of the fence (they'd reminisced about it two days ago) and were _slightly _successful, causing a small opening they could up till now still pass through. Better yet, that opening was well concealed by brambles of roses.

The elderly bartender grinned a bit to himself. "She was a radiant thing, dear. Came every night she didn't have a theatre show with her mate. Practically lit up the bar with her jokes and – I won't lie to you, Rina pretty – and her flirting. She always told us, being a Jellicle's dreary. I'd love to escape one day."

"And that's exactly what she did," replied Bombalurina dryly. "She abandoned me and my father."

"Oh, sweetie, don't think she didn't care about ya," Augustus, another old patron of the No Man's, said from his seat. "Bella always told us, I've got me a lovely daughter. I'll be sorry to leave her."

"Then _why did she leave?_" the scarlet queen asked, growing partly irritated. If Grizabella had had an inkling of love for her, then that was that. Yet she still deserted the tribe. It made no sense when put together.

"We're not her," Grumbuskin shrugged, but gazed upon Bombalurina with a bit of sadness. "But she always told us, I wasn't born to live in a cushy cramped junkyard. I got to roam. It's in my _nature_."

Bombalurina laughed bitterly, clutching her glass a little tighter. "There she goes again with her nature. 'Oh, I'm a Glamour Cat, it's in my _nature_. I can't just stay here!' She spouted that trash on me, too."

"And yet here you are," said Peter, but without ill will. He'd muttered it gently. The scarlet queen turned her head to stare at him.

"I'm still with the Jellicles. I haven't deserted them; I'll always be with them."

The black tom nodded, his golden eyes mild. "That's noble of you, really." Bombalurina was just about ready to blush, when suddenly the tom to her left spoke up.

"It makes no sense to me," Tugger said, sounding greatly annoyed. "This place sounded just about in its prime when Grizzy girl was around. What's happened to it then? No lights, no music, _no queens_. All I smell is dust and gin and all I see are… _old people_."

Peter laughed out loud. Bombalurina and Tugger were rather surprised; the reaction they both expected was an offended one. The outsider tom reached around the queen and gave the Maine Coon a gentle slap on the back.

"Right you are, Tug," he smiled. "But I told you, it's Thursday. Nobody comes on Thursday. Just you wait till _Friday_. Well, that's when your lights and music and queens come in. Let's all just enjoy this peace and quiet for now, yeah?"

Tugger visibly shrank back from his touch, eyeing him with hostility. "Right. Yeah."

Bombalurina could have punched him right then and there. Why was he being so _rude? _These complete strangers were treating them with friendliness, and here he was complaining about how boring the bar seemed. She'd brought him here because she trusted him.

"Grizabella was rightly truly the most stunning queen to grace the No Man's," Augustus croaked suddenly, breaking her train of thought. "And any smart old cat can take a gander at you and say you're just as much a beauty."

"I can definitely agree with that," Peter murmured. And there, right there, Bombalurina lowered her eyes and blushed, and she cursed herself silently for looking so vulnerable to compliments.

* * *

"I don't like them," Tugger declared aloud as the two walked down the road back to the Junkyard.

"How could you not?" asked Bombalurina, who was visibly irritated. "They've been so kind to us. They let us in and served us at a moment's notice. And you just sit there, whining about how there are _no queens_."

"It's not _that!_" the Maine Coon shot back. "I don't trust them! Why have you got it hammered into your head that they're a bunch of sweet and innocent souls?"

The scarlet queen stopped in her tracks and scowled at him. "We're no bunch of sweet and innocent souls, either, mind you! This is the second time we've gone out of the junkyard!"

"And that, too," Tugger rolled his eyes. "We're traitors now. We're exactly what you hate. We're exactly what the whole damn tribe hates! Can you imagine how much trouble we'll both get into once we're found out? I don't know about you, Bombie darling, but I'd rather live the rest of my life with all of my limbs intact."

The black-and-gold tom turned gruffly around to trudge back to the junkyard, but Bombalurina took hold of one of his arms and with all her strength tried to hold him back. "Tugger – _Tugger_ – please, not so fast. You can't just leave me like this."

The Maine Coon continued to pull away from her, but his resistance weakened noticeably. Still gripping his wrist, Bombalurina went on. "I- I need to learn more. About my mother and about her past. This is a part of my life I'm completely missing out on. I can't just keep escaping alone. Please, Tugger, you have to stay with me for this. I can't do it alone."

Tugger was no longer trying to walk away, and he sighed. "Okay. _Okay_. One more time, tomorrow night. We'll go back one more time, and that's it. We'll be in so much shit if we make this a regular thing."

Bombalurina let go and let herself relax. "I can live with that." As they both walked back to the junkyard, the scarlet queen tried to figure out whether this was all for "learning more", or just for the thrill of being outside.


	5. You Do the Best in Your Worst

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Well... I have no excuse for why this took so long! I simply had one AWFUL bout of writer's block. D: I didn't intend for this chapter to be this long. I was writing it and I figured, "eh, just shmush two chapters together, I guess." (P.S. Shmush is not a real word.) This one's a little longer than usual, but I DO hope you'll find reading it to the end worth your while. :D

* * *

**Wild Rose**

**CHAPTER 5

* * *

**

"_Bombalurina? Rina, come here, baby."_

_The kitten wavered in her place. She sat back down on the ground, unresponsive. The striking young queen sitting on the tire tried again, leaning forward with her hands outstretched._

"_Come here, kitten. Come to mummy."_

_The dark red kitten simply stared up at her, wide-eyed. She stubbornly made no effort to stand back up, and began to lick her lips._

_Her mother dropped her hands to her lap, and sighed. "You won't walk; you won't even stand. Is it me, baby girl? Am I a good mother at all?"_

"_No," tiny Bombalurina answered, not understanding. It was her first word._

_Grizabella got down from the tire, and knelt before her daughter. "You're a smart little baby kitten. It's true. I'm not a mother. Can't be."_

"_No," her kitten said again, wiggling her fingers as she looked down at them. "No, no."_

"_I like to sing," Grizabella shrugged, encircling her hands around Bombalurina's chubby wrists. "I like to dance. I like to act. But, Bast help me, I don't like to be a mother. I can love, yes, I can love _you_, but I can't be a mother for you, Rina baby."_

_The kitten simply continued to ogle her forearms. Her mother's deep red fingers blended perfectly with her own fur._

"_We're both scarlet," said Grizabella, noticing what she was staring at. "A very rare color, did you know? We're both rare. You know what your daddy calls us? We're his scarlet-starlets. Scarlet and starlet rhyme, don't they, baby?"_

"_No," Bombalurina mewled. She raised one of her wrists, with her mother's hand still attached to it, and began to nibble at a joint of one of Grizabella's slender fingers. What she usually did was pull her hand back with mild disgust, but this time the queen surrendered._

"_No, no. No is right. I could never leave you," Grizabella shook her head. Bombalurina, completely distracted, continued to lick at her mother's pinky. "At least not now. I can't leave you now."_

* * *

"Are you excited for tonight?"

Bombalurina stopped inspecting her claws, and looked up at Demeter, bewildered. "What? Tonight? _What?_"

Her friend gazed at her bemusedly, as she held one of her fumbling sons, Newton, on her lap as they sat atop a junk pile. "Aren't _you _all tips and toes. I was just asking if you were excited for it."

The scarlet queen's heart dropped down to her stomach, then bounced up to her throat, and crashed crookedly back into her chest. But no, Demeter couldn't possibly have found out about her trips outside the junkyard. "What are you talking about?"

Demeter then seemed slightly insulted. "You've forgotten. We're celebrating tonight. We've got nine new kits in the tribe. Mine and Cassandra's. You helped deliver them all, remember? Well, you helped deliver mine at least."

Bombalurina was able to regain her voice in time to reply. "…of course. Yes I am excited. I'm sorry. I've been lacking sleep lately."

The gold-and-black queen rolled her eyes and laughed lightly. "I thought that was _always _the case with you."

"Now _everyone's _making jokes about me, hmm?" Bombalurina raised an eyebrow, and pretended to take offense. "Oh, whatever. I might as well carry myself with pride. How are your kits, though? _Munkus _says they're real joys."

"He says that because he's the father," Demeter rolled her eyes again. Newton squirmed on her lap, and she held him down like an expert. "He doesn't have to go through midnight feedings and carrying all four kittens in your arms at once. But, yes, _sometimes _they're real joys. Lovely joys, in fact. I'd recommend one or two."

Bombalurina stared at her friend, baffled. "Recommend _kittens? _To _me? _Everlasting Cat, Demsies, you've gone crazy. Well, you did a long time ago, but you've gone crazy _all the way _this time."

Demeter flashed an uncharacteristically devious grin. "It's just a little sneak peek of what you'll become once you're a mother."

"Right," replied the scarlet queen sarcastically. "And, um… I don't think I can come to the celebration tonight." An image of the smiling patrons of the No Man's appeared in her head. "I've got… plans."

"What," Demeter asked dryly, her brows furrowing. "Another tomfriend? Come on, Rina. You're one of my closest friends. I want you to be there when they have their names instated. I want you as their godmother."

This was the last night in _The No Man's Land _allowed her by Tugger. Anxious, she pressed on. "But _Demsies_-"

"You _will _be there," the gold-and-black queen said firmly. She put Newton down, leaned forward, and jabbed a finger hard at Bombalurina's chest, her eyes wide. "You _will_, and I will keep an eye on you so you can't slip away."

The queen stared at her friend, flabbergasted. "Demeter, you're positively _crazy. _But okay, okay. I will."

"Good." Demeter relaxed and sat down again, pulling her son back into her lap. Being a mother seemed to absolutely exhaust her, because she closed her eyes and promptly dozed off. Bombalurina watched her sleep, and at the same time desperately tried to think up an escape plan.

* * *

Every Jellicle stayed in the clearing, their heads craned to look at the kittens, their parents, their godparents, and Old Deuteronomy standing atop the tire.

"I christen you Newton of Munkustrap and Demeter…" the elderly Leader put the fidgety kitten down and plodded over to pick up another. "…and I christen you Ambrose of Munkustrap and Demeter…"

Bast, why did he have to go so fantastically _slow? _If she hadn't been standing, Bombalurina was certain she would have fallen asleep. She took a sneaking glance at the crowd below – Tugger looked just as bored.

"…and I christen you Silas of Munkustrap and Demeter…" Newly named Silas hiccupped in the Leader's clutch.

How long was this going to take? How much time did she still have to get to the No Man's to visit Grumbuskin and Augustus and darling Peter? _Please, Bast, _Bombalurina looked slightly up to the sky, despite the fact that what she was praying for wasn't exactly the nicest thing. _Let me leave._

"…and I christen you Myrtle of Munkustrap and Demeter…"

The queen's eyes scanned the crowd. They were the same unchanging faces. Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer exchanging seemingly humorous comments about the ritual. Jennyanydots looking up at the newborn kittens with a cheery smile. Coricopat and Tantomile watching with a polite silence. Jemima looking nervous beside them. And Tugger, staring directly back at her.

Bombalurina, taken by surprise, quickly diverted her gaze. Why, oh why wasn't anything happening?

"…and I christen you Julius of Alonzo and Cassandra…"

Out from the corner of her eye, Bombalurina noticed something stranger. Jemima was beginning to blink rapidly; some invisible force was shoving her left and right. The dark young queen grasped at Coricopat's arm. He probably thought she was just trying to bother him – he smoothly brushed her hands away without turning his head.

Bombalurina was horrified. Jemima let go of Coricopat's arm and stumbled backwards, twitching incessantly. She began to hyperventilate, backing away from the crowd of Jellicles, until finally the scarlet queen saw her pupils roll upwards and her eyes go completely white.

"_Jemima-_" the young queen's name escaped roughly from Bombalurina's throat, and she suddenly became voiceless.

The throng of cats all followed the direction of her gaze – Old Deuteronomy paused mid-lift of baby Rowena – and saw white-eyed Jemima look up to the sky, trying to take a gulp of air, and collapsing to the ground.

A collective gasp ran through the Jellicles. The cats on the tire – Old Deuteronomy, the parents, the godparents, the kittens – had all turned to see. Jemima continued to twitch on the ground, and Coricopat scooped her up protectively in his arms. He and Tantomile whipped around and ran off to a remote area of the junkyard, despite the fact that everyone else was attempting to follow.

The tribe was in utter chaos. Some were scrambling towards the Twins' direction to check on Jemima, others had been preoccupied and were now wondering what the fuss was all about. But even from her place Bombalurina could see that everyone was completely distracted.

Hurriedly she jumped down from the tire and made a run for it. She dashed past Tugger and grabbed his wrist, and they raced together toward the hole in the fence hidden beneath the roses as the chatter of the Jellicles faded away behind her.

"Bombie, what the hell! Slow _down_," the Maine Coon hissed as Bombalurina fumbled through the vines, looking for the opening. Frantically he turned his head back towards the main clearing. "What the hell happened to Jemima back there?"

"We'll make this quick," replied the scarlet queen quickly. "We'll make this quick, I promise. Then we'll go check." In her moment of panic she couldn't figure out whether she was assuring Tugger or herself. Pushing away several rose vines she finally found the opening, and sighed with relief that it was still there. She grasped Tugger's hand and pulled him through with her.

* * *

The city of London was as peaceful as the junkyard was not. The two Jellicles – ex-Jellicles now, if they understood the politics correctly – stumbled onto the empty road. Wasting no time, Bombalurina began to walk briskly towards the alley of _The No Man's Land._

"Bombie," said Tugger, following closely behind. "This is crazy! This past-business is making you act _completely _different."

"What does it matter?" Bombalurina retorted without taking her eyes off her path. "You allowed me this last night."

The tom caught up with her. "Well, I change my mind!"

"No!" the scarlet queen abruptly stopped walking and glared hard at him. "No, Tugger, you can't just _do _that! This isn't the Jellicle tribe. This isn't where you can just decide one thing then go with the other, like you _always _do! You allowed me to go, and we're out of the junkyard anyway, so I'm finishing this."

"You've become so weird," Tugger said resentfully. "You know what? You used to be funny. And, well, _nice_. I knew I didn't have to put up with any shit around you. And now you're always so hung up over some old queen you never gave two shits about before just because it gets you out of the junkyard."

"That's not true," Bombalurina replied, hurt. "That's _not _true."

Before the Maine Coon could reply, the sound of distant chatter grew louder, and an unseen door burst open. From the corner of her eye Bombalurina saw light flood out from a narrow alley. _The No Man's Land_. The shadows of dozens of strangers covered the wall of the alley they could see.

"What the hell?" Tugger murmured, now distracted. "…There weren't as many cats as that last night."

"That was Thursday," said Bombalurina, her spirits slightly lifted. She began to walk towards the bar. "Nobody comes on Thursday."

As the pair came closer, the throng of new cats turned clearer. They were a diverse bunch – some wild looking, some prim, and all a patchwork of feline colors. There were some toms, and quite a number of giggling queens, lining up to enter the No Man's.

"Bast _screw _me," the scarlet queen heard Tugger mutter behind her. A little more confidently, she strode over to the alleyway. And who else could have been standing at the entrance of the bar? Handsome, mysterious Peter, controlling the flood of customers. He lifted his bright yellow eyes from the crowd to meet with Bombalurina's, and promptly grinned.

"Bombalurina and Rum Tum Tugger!" he exclaimed as the dazed pair came into the light shafting out from the bar. His voice beat out those of the waiting cats. "We're all happy you could make it."

Before Bombalurina could even smile back and respond, the black tom reached out and took both their arms. "Well, don't mind this line here; we're still treatin' you as our VIP's." He pulled them past the group of strangers – Tugger managed a wink at a few of the queens – and into the bar.

It was much more crowded than it had been the two previous days. Mixed with the usual aged patrons were several younger ones. The board that covered the hole leading into the human's side had been moved slightly away; the music being played from there was now much louder. Grumbuskin had a few more companions helping him out behind the counter, all much younger and, well, cleaner-looking.

"Our favorite girl!" Grumbuskin beamed at her. "What will it be?"

Bombalurina strode confidently over to the counter. "Just the usual for the two of us, Grumby, and keep them coming."

"Who-the-two?" sang the elderly barkeep, grinning at the queen. "You and Peter?"

"No, me and T-" Bombalurina was about to shake her head no, but at the very sidelines something caught her eye – Tugger had already found a cozy spot in the bar by himself, and was smirking at the throng of queens he had effortlessly attracted. The only tom standing behind Bombalurina now was Peter, smiling courteously despite his wild orange-and-black appearance. "…Yes, me and Peter."

Two filled glasses slid their way to the scarlet queen. She eagerly took one and downed the gin in a few gulps. She'd found it surprisingly easy to get used to a drink that originally caused a fire in her throat. Beside her, Peter took the other glass and drank it the same way.

The tall black tom seemed to notice that she'd been staring at him, so he turned slightly and bared his teeth in a rugged, cheeky grin. Bombalurina managed to smile back as Grumbuskin slid them two new orders.

A foreign arm brushed against her side. Bombalurina turned to see a Manx queen with her arms resting atop the counter, flashing a sugary-sweet look at one of the younger bartenders. She was gingery red sprinkled over white. The queen let her copper eyes slip over to Bombalurina.

"Lovely night," she purred civilly.

"Lovely night," the scarlet nodded in agreement, and they clinked together their glasses before gulping them down.

"I've never seen you here before," said the Manx, swirling the remaining gin around in her glass. It sounded like a request for information, but she went on, "My name's Patricia, but onstage I'm Prismaline. I sing and dance, you see? Someday I'll act too. I'll be a star. Till then, I'll complain about whoever's unlucky enough to be my current tom-friend here in the No Man's."

Patricia – Prismaline – whatever she wanted to be called, laughed at her own joke. "Oh, of course. What's your story, friend?"

Bombalurina figured that she didn't want her name to be too widely spread, lest it be revealed that a Jellicle was openly prowling the streets. "I'm Griza," she replied, taking half her mother's name. "I roam, that's all, with my… brother…" -she poked a finger at Tugger's direction; he was now sitting at the bar with a gaggle of females, laughing over a just-finished joke- "…and I just found this place two days ago. It's quite nice."

"Griza…" repeated Patricia thoughtfully. It appeared she'd missed the rest of what Bombalurina had said. She gazed at nothing for a short moment. "I figure your parents were a fan of Grizabella, then?"

Bombalurina nearly jumped in her place. "…Grizabella?" Even total strangers knew her mother now. Hastily she drank from her glass in a poor attempt to stay casual.

Patricia smiled, as if the queen had touched a subject she was an expert on. "I don't know what rock you've lived under, darling. Grizabella, the Glamour Cat. She used to perform in the theater a few doors down with that star Asparagus. I was just a kitten when I first watched her. But she's my idol. A perfect actress and singer and dancer and whatever you'd think up. Your parents must have named you Griza in her honor."

_Honor. _Something Bombalurina knew her mother knew nothing about. She gulped down her remaining gin and quickly said, "Nice talking to you."

The entire bar began to tilt slightly to the right, then to the left. Shit. How many glasses had she had? Only three. Still a safe number, according to the more experienced drinkers. But cats weren't as strong as humans. Patricia seemed to have slipped away to find others to talk to. Bombalurina craned her head towards Grumbuskin.

"Grumby," called out the scarlet queen. The music was hard to overpower. "Another drink. How'd you find out that my mother left the junkyard?"

The bartender thought for a few moments as he passed her some more gin. "Well, 'course the first place she came was here. Bella told us everything. She was _supposed _to have a show that night, with your daddy, but she couldn't bear going through the old routine again. "

Bombalurina promptly downed half the glass. "Did she say anything about… _me?_"

"Course she did. She said, I remember, I'll miss most my baby, Rina. She's such a beauty. She's never done anything wrong. What I hope is that she won't be a Glamour Cat like me. Flirting all the time, showing off all the time, and worst of all wanting to escape the junkyard and… Rina girl, are you alright?"

Bombalurina had slumped a third of the way downwards, staring wide-eyed at the floor of the bar. Flirting, showing off, escaping…

"Do you need some air?" Peter's voice interrupted her thoughts again, and he felt his hands clasp both her shoulders kindly. The chatter of the bar patrons grew louder. From the corner of her eye Bombalurina could see Tugger swaying a bit in his seat. He looked as drunk as the giggling queens around him.

"Grumby… another glass, please," murmured the scarlet queen, noticing that she'd finished her gin again. As soon as the new glass came, she gulped down most of it. "Was my mother really like that?"

"She said she did," answered Grumbuskin. "But you should know that she regretted a lot of it. Who knows? Maybe she left the Jellicles because she knew they'd never forgive her. A cat like her could never fit in with them."

Something twisted inside of her. The bar began to rock up and down. Too proud to show that her legs were going weak, Bombalurina pushed herself off the counter, no matter how wobbly her knees were, and tried her hardest to stand tall. "And she didn't."

"It looks that way," the bartender said, looking a little sad.

"Rina," she felt Peter's warm breath travel down her neck. "How much did you drink?"

Even as the room began to do somersaults the queen could see Tugger stand up shakily, and laughing aloud. Maybe they were making a spectacle. She didn't feel like minding that.

"My mother flirted and slept with toms while mated with another and went outside the junkyard and broke all the rules," Bombalurina said in what felt like one sharp breath. "And she didn't care. She didn't care one bit. And I guess I don't care now, either."

She stumbled away, towards – nothing? She didn't know. Every time she blinked her sight turned to shapes, then blurs, then colors. Patron's voices turned into the creaking of a well-worn door, and then turned into the soft buzz of a city at night. She was outside now, she figured, walking aimlessly.

Her mother did everything, she figured. Lied, loved, lost, lived freely. _Bast, we're exactly alike_¸ Bombalurina yelled at the Grizabella in her head. _The only difference is I acknowledge that we're shit._

Her feet met the cold pavement of an empty road. "Damn it," she cried aloud, blindly. "I hate you. I _hate _you."

All she could see was black and sky and moon, but some close, silent warmth indicated that someone was outside with her. She didn't really care who. Bombalurina latched onto that someone's arm, and even in her dizziness tried to hide the fact that she was crying.

What came next was as vague as everything before. That someone took hold of her. Suddenly she was warm all around.

Something pressed against her back, supporting her. It was cold and partly prickly - the wire of the junkyard fence? Vines of roses grew through, and she could feel petals and thorns brushing against her shoulders, her legs.

It was then when that someone kissed her, the way someone hungry treated food. There was an exchange of hot breath. A slight pain lingered on her lips… Bast, was he biting? He was biting hard. Her old tears and the night air stung her cheeks.

Now fingers wove their way into her fur, slipping deep beneath the scarlet, to brushing against the sensitive skin that lay underneath. At first they gripped her shoulders obediently, and then gave up their shyness to hold her around the waist. Bombalurina breathed hard, opening her mouth against the kiss.

She was hurting and relaxing at the same time. Kissing and holding were so familiar. What on earth was happening to her then? She forced her eyes open, to see the jet black fur against her scarlet.

Every feeling next felt like a passing wave.

"Bombie," Tugger murmured.

She sank into a peculiar bliss, and that was all that mattered for now.


	6. Half and Half

A/N: Hello all! Next week will be my exam week, so don't expect too much activity from me... school's turned me into a hideous hag.

This is a particularly short entry. It's mostly a transition from one part of the story to the next. And no, it is NOT the last chapter, even if it looks that way! ;D Enjoy, and happy December.

* * *

**Wild Rose**

**CHAPTER 6

* * *

**

The dull throbbing she could deal with, but she knew she would never get used to that sick hollowness in her chest.

She had sunken snugly into a groove of the blankets, like she'd been still for a long time. The palm her head was laying on was completely numb. She could barely open her eyes.

Tugger had his back to her as they both lay on the bed. He was still asleep. His mane and fur were uncharacteristically mussed; she figured he took a solid hour grooming it each morning before even coming out into the junkyard. She caught herself thinking peculiarly casual things, despite the circumstance.

Bombalurina had slept with the Rum Tum Tugger. She repeated it in her mind. She knew it was going to happen eventually, anyway. The soreness in her head had settled into some form of acceptance over that fact.

With a weak sigh she sat up and turned to put her feet on the ground. It was strangely warm, a sure sign of summer greeting spring. Autumn would follow, and soon winter. Jenny's roses would surely wilt.

Unlike her headache the morning before, this one was not willing to be ignored. Woozy, she sat on the bed for a while. She tried to make the den stop rocking back and forth. On the bed, she could still sense Tugger shifting, sinking in and out of an unsure sleep.

Her thoughts from last night were pounding back into her head, like loud rain. Her mother Grizabella was a traitor. She deserted the tribe, abandoned her family, and lived without sense in the outside world. And the worst thing was that they were exactly alike.

Bombalurina stood up and made her way out of the den. Behind her, there was no sound. Tugger hadn't woken up and noticed.

As the daylight hit her eyes, the pang in her chest came stronger. _Whatever the hell I'm going to do_, she thought, _I'd better do quick._

The main clearing was empty. It must have been just after dawn. The roses weaving through the fence wire were already showing signs of suffering from the change of climate. She'd grown up in this single vast junkyard, and had known nothing else until a few days ago. Bombalurina held herself even if it wasn't cold at all.

She looked to the car hood and saw something wholly unusual. A solitary Tantomile, sleepy-eyed, sat while gazing away at nothing, without a Coricopat or Jemima to accompany Bombalurina, puzzled, climbed her way down the junk piles and slowly made her way to her.

"Bombalurina."

She jumped. Tantomile had seen her while looking off at another direction. She tried to rub the sleep and sting out of her eyes.

"Good morning, Tantomile," she muttered, her throat sore as it cracked with her first words for the day.

"Good morning," the female Twin inspected her claws. "You're up rather early for a Saturday."

Bombalurina didn't bother to retort with a _so are you_. She tried to ignore her throbbing headache. "Where are Coricopat and Jemima?"

"They're both in our den. Coricopat is taking care of Jemima while she recovers from last night's… scene. He's odd, my brother. I've never seen him dote so carefully over someone. He's embarrassed that I witness it."

That memory ran tumbling back into Bombalurina's head. Of course. Before escaping to _The_ _No Man's Land _it had been the christening of the new kittens. That was when she saw Jemima collapse in front of the tribe, convulsing by some unknown force.

"Bast. What happened to Jemima that time?"

"Would you believe it?" said Tantomile, finally turning to the scarlet queen. "She had her first vision."

Bombalurina blinked, trying to absorb the information. She remembered that Jemima had wanted to make her teachers proud by having a vision. "Well, isn't that a cause for celebration?"

"Of course it is," Tantomile nodded. "But Jemima will have to rest for now. First vision is often hard on a novice mystic."

Mystic. What a surprising name to attach to the young queen's. "Are visions always that… violent?"

"Not at all. Over time the body grows accustomed to the soul separating to visit another time or place."

What a poetic way to understand visions, Bombalurina thought. _For someone to be separated, half and half…_

"You're unwell," observed the Twin, coolly. "You take a long time to understand each thing I say."

"I did terrible things last night."

"As for most nights where mornings of regret follow."

"I slept with Tugger."

"That's not a terrible thing. And we both knew that was going to happen sometime."

"It's not that," Bombalurina shook her head. The pang in her chest felt harder and hollower than before. "It's just that… now that we've gone through that… I'm not sure how he'll feel about me leaving."

"So now you're leaving," Tantomile said, as if it were the most normal thing in the world. Bombalurina had always found it eerie how she never reacted to anything. Had she grown so good at visions now that she knew absolutely everything that was going to happen?

"My head hurts so much," the scarlet queen groaned, gluing her eyes shut. She reached up to rub her face.

"You're having a hangover. You drank last night."

"No. I mean, yes. I mean, I don't completely _remember _being drunk, but I'm pretty sure I did, because I don't remember a thing."

"So why are you leaving the Jellicles?"

Bombalurina opened her eyes, and then closed them again. She began to blink, slowly, as if shutting Tantomile in and out of view. She just realized what she'd told her, this peculiar secret friend of hers, and it came as a surprise and a relief that Tantomile wasn't yelling her to high Heaviside like any other Jellicle would have.

The scarlet queen breathed. "Who's to say I'm even a Jellicle anymore? I've gone out of the junkyard three times. I've lied to Munkustrap. I don't even _like _it here anymore. Maybe I'm meant to leave, like-"

"…like your mother," finished Tantomile. The Mystic leaned closer to her. "Are you sure you're not leaving simply because you think you're bound to the same fate as she is?"

Bombalurina shook her head. "What do I know about fate? You would know it better. At first I thought my mother was a traitor. But now I've started off like she did. Doesn't that mean I'll eventually do everything she's done?"

"Well," Tantomile purred, strangely serene. "Do you _want _to?"

"I – well, I – I wouldn't know that now. I was thinking-" Bombalurina noticed now that she was biting her lip, and twisting one of her fingers – "I was thinking _you _would know."

"Bombalurina," Tantomile said to her coolly, placing her elbows on the car hood to face the scarlet queen directly. "What my brother and I see in our visions is not for us to decide. It's what Bast chooses to show us. If you prefer the formality, it's what the Everlasting Cat chooses to show us. As much as I'd like to help you, Bombalurina, I can only do as much as Bast desires me to."

"Are you saying…?"

"You are freed from the expectations of knowing the future. You can choose what you want to do," answered the Mystic. She lowered her eyes, and turned her head as she combed down some rebellious fur on her arm. "It might interest you to know what Jemima's first vision was. She told it to me during some five minutes of consciousness last night."

"Was… was it about me?" the scarlet queen remembered how Jemima had wanted to see her in a vision. What could she have seen? Bombalurina, old and withered and forgotten?

"Actually, it wasn't about you at all," Tantomile looked again at Bombalurina, calm. "It was about your friend, the Rum Tum Tugger."

_Friend. Right, we'll keep it at that, _thought Bombalurina. She swallowed hard. "What was he doing?"

"Not much. He was walking away from something. All Jemima saw, she said, was his back as he left. You can't expect much from a novice's vision."

The vision had nothing to do with her fate, but the scarlet queen shivered despite the nearing summer. She was reminded of the tom she'd left behind in his den, which would wake up and assume that she'd gone away for a walk, to wait and wait until he realized that she had left the junkyard. Nevertheless, she willed herself to shake the thought away.

"That won't change anything," Bombalurina said, beginning to step away. "I still want to leave the junkyard."

"Bombalurina, wait," Tantomile suddenly called out, with unusual hastiness. The scarlet queen froze in her place. "I… just want you to know the risk you're taking. Coricopat and I are _not _from the original lineage of the Jellicle tribe. We joined from outside years ago. We are both Half Jellicles; we're under the same rules as Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer are. That would mean we may have no relationships with full members. You would think that would be easy for Twins like us…"

The Mystic breathed in slowly, as if embarrassed by everything she'd just blurted. "…Coricopat deeply cares for Jemima, too much. He knows that I know, and he also knows that it's illegal. If you leave, and suddenly come back, the most you can ever be is a Half Jellicle like us, and even that is exactly like isolation…"

At that moment Bombalurina wondered if Tantomile had ever fallen in love with anybody in the tribe. She found it strange how the queen had never before batted an eyelash over her travels outside the junkyard, but now that Bombalurina was threatening to leave forever, she was actually raising her voice. But one look into the Mystic's steely eyes and she decided that it wasn't her right to ask.

Mentally, she added Tantomile onto her list of cats she would sorely miss.

"The others will be up soon," said Bombalurina, even if _Tugger will be up soon _was more tempting to say. "I want to leave."

"Then go," Tantomile replied calmly. "Leave."

Bombalurina hesitated, and then nodded. "Goodbye, Tantomile."

The female Twin turned away in her place, possibly heading back to check on Jemima and her brother. "Goodbye."

As Tantomile disappeared into a dim corner within the junk piles, Bombalurina began the long walk to the edge of the yard, to find the secret exit.

She repeated_ you're being an idiot _and _what do you think you're doing _and _you'll regret it in five minutes _in her head over and over again, to see if doing so would change her mind. Each sentence brought a sting to her eye, but not much else.

The roses she and Tugger had used to hide the escape were beginning to wilt to muddy brown. As she brushed the vines away, a few old blossoms were snapped off their stems and they fell one by one to the ground. _No matter now_, she thought to herself, setting the remaining brambles apart. _No matter now if they see this._

The air outside the junkyard was just as warm as the air within. What was she more of, a Jellicle or a Glamour Cat? Or was she an unfortunate half-and-half of both?

The roads that disappeared into the endless city held a thrilling uncertainty. The scarlet queen took a breath, stepped through, and didn't look back.


End file.
